Traditional NJ adoptions meant the birth parents had no contact with a child after their parental rights ended. In open adoptions, there can be varying degrees of communications between the child and birth parents.  These are more common today than at any time in the past.  However, New Jersey courts will not presently enforce an agreement between the parties specifying an open adoption.

What is an Adoption?
Adoption is a legal process where all rights, duties, privileges, and relationships between the child and their birth parents end — and the adoptive parents become the child’s legal parents. This ancient process is governed by New Jersey statutes and court cases interpreting them. A finalized adoption creates the same legal relationship between the child and his/her adoptive parents that would exist if the child had been born to them.

What is an Open Adoption?

In an open adoption, one or both birth parents are permitted to have contact with the child after the adoption is legally complete. It can be as frequent and intimate as the adoptive parents permit. While they may choose to permit the contacts to continue indefinitely, the adoptive parents also have the power to stop the contacts. Any promises to the birth parents or agreements with them stating the adoption is open aren’t currently legally enforceable in our State.

Can Birth Parents Ask for Future Contact?

Adults born in New Jersey and adopted as children have a right to get uncertified and long-form copies of their original birth certificates from the New Jersey Department of Health, Office of Vital Statistics and Registry.

This records system allows birth parents to file a document stating their preference for future contact with a child surrendered for adoption. It can be for direct, indirect, or no contact. That preference can change at any time. Birth parents can state a preference, but there’s no legal way to force the adoptive parents or child to contact them in the future.

While adoptive parents have access to the child’s birth certificate from the start of the adoption process, adopted children can’t access it from the State until they reach 18.

What’s the NJ Legal Process of Adopting a Minor?

The adoption process has three parts:

1. Identify the child and their birth parents
2. The birth parent(s) surrender their rights to the child to an adoption agency or before the court, and the court terminates their rights
3. The legal process of joining the child with their new parents

An adoption agency:

• Is licensed by the State
• Prepares evaluations of potential adoptive parents’ homes
• Places children for adoption
• Performs home evaluations after an adoption

An adoption agency may carry both parties through the process, yet only an attorney may finalize the agency placement through the courts.

What is Private Placement Adoption?
A private placement adoption occurs if the birth and adoptive parents connect outside an agency. This may happen through friends, family, doctors, or clergy members. Both sets of parents may meet before or during the birth at a hospital. Attorneys help parents create a binding and private placement adoption.

What are the Pros and Cons of an Open Adoption?

The costs and benefits of an open adoption depend on the parties involved.

1.    Birth Parents

With open adoption, birth parents may choose who the adoptive parents will be, making them more comfortable with their choice of adoptive parents. The adoptive parents will be kept up-to-date on how the child is doing. Depending on the arrangements, the birth parents may get photos of the child and meet him or her.

Currently, agreements on what the adoptive parents will or won’t do for birth parents can’t be enforced in court, so birth parents must rely on adoptive parents’ goodwill. On the other hand, birth parents may not feel closure if there’s ongoing communication with the child.

2.    Adoptive Parents

Being chosen by birth parents may make adoptive parents more confident when they are raising their child. When you share with your child the fact they’re adopted and who the birth parents are, the child may feel better because there is no hidden or shameful secret involved in their birth and transfer. Adoptive parents should also know their child’s medical history and may learn about the birth parents’ and siblings’ health conditions if the adoption is left open.

There are some conundrums built in that the adoptive parents should consider and deal with.  Adoptive parents may feel excluded if the child and the birth parents make a strong connection. Unless boundaries are set and enforced with birth parents, there is a risk the birth parents may get the benefit of a continuing relationship with the birth child, yet none of the financial responsibilities. If you’re uncomfortable with what’s happening between your child and the birth parents and feel the need to end communications, it could harm your relationship with your child.  Of course, after age 18, the birth parents and the adopted child may create whatever relationship suits them.  At that point, the adoptive parents have no further say in the matter.

3.    Adopted Child

With open adoption, the child can learn the identities of their natural parents and not speculate what happened and why they were adopted. They may learn about siblings and extended family members. They may not feel as angry at their birth parents if they gave them up for adoption because it was in the child’s best interests.

The child may also feel torn between two families. If your child is racially and/or ethnically different than you, the child may feel a deeper divide. Your child may try to play one set of parents against the other if they think they will get what they want.

Learn More by Arranging a Consultation Today

If you have questions about adoption or want legal help with the process, arrange a consultation with a family law attorney at Kingston Law Group by emailing our office or calling us at 609-683-7400 toll-free. Our appointments are from 9 a.m. to 5:30 p.m., Monday to Friday, or at pre-arranged times during the evening. We accept all major credit cards.

Write or call us today.  You will be glad you did.